


Justification

by BBtheUke



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Elricest, Forced Relationship, It Gets Worse, M/M, Please Don't Hate Me, Possessive Behavior, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-08
Updated: 2017-07-27
Packaged: 2018-11-11 00:34:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11137725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BBtheUke/pseuds/BBtheUke
Summary: Promise day had turned to night, and Al's body had been restored. Although many people saw this as a blessing, to the Elric brother's it had turned into a curse worse than before. Al was beginning to feel new things, ones that came with the coming of age and the loss of innocence, and all Ed could do was justify what his brother was doing.Author's note: I might edit these chapters later as I write more.





	1. Resentment.

Today was “Promise day” in more ways than one, not only was it the name given to this day by the homunculi, but it was also the day that Edward Elric finally was able to complete his promise to Alphonse. To say that this day was surreal for both Elric brothers was an understatement, yet, it wasn’t the joy of being human again what kept Al away this night.

No, Al couldn’t bring himself to sleep because his brother way laying only a few feet away from him, sleeping so soundly, after Al had wronged him.

 _‘You.’_ Alphonse brought his hand to his head. The clean white walls of the room reminded him of the gate and although it pained him it was the only way he could turn without looking at him.

“You did so much for me, and yet this is how I repay you.” Al’s lips parted mindlessly as words left his mouth, it was so natural that the younger blonde hadn’t realized that he spoke until his elder had begun to move.

Ed’s eyelashes fluttered as he attempted to get use to the darkness of the room only to give up on it a second later, thinking it would be best to keep his eyes closed. “Al, what the hell are you doing awake this late?” Ed spoke in a more worried than annoyed tone as he turned to his side.

The skeletal male turned to his brother, a brief memory came to his mind from about a year prior. Alphonse recalled the sadness in his brother’s voice because he wanted to know if Al resented him for what had happened.

Now it was his turn to share that sadness, it was justified after everything Al put his brother through. The air between Alphonse and the former alchemist was cold, this only served to deepen the fear of the younger brother as his thoughts bore into him like the thousand needles he felt on his skin. _‘Is this what you felt every time you looked at me brother?’_

The thinner blonde’s thoughts were pierced before any resolve could be reached within him, not in a way that would turn him away from reaching one, but rather one that gave him a new one that crushed the other two.

“What’s wrong Al?” Ed asked. Now that Al realized it, his brother had a nice voice, especially when he was passionate. This caused a small feeling to pit in the bottom of the younger’s stomach that immediately replaced the regret. This feeling was Alphonse more than welcomed at least until he remembers he had to respond to the one who caused him all this.

“O-Oh, it’s nothing. I guess I just… forgot how to sleep.” He spoke sheepishly as a rosy tint filled his cheeks. _‘Why does my body feel so good with this? Is it **you** brother?’_

“Well..;” Seeing no other way around it, Edward stood up and clumsily began to feel around the room until he reached his brother’s bed. “Scoot over a bit, will ya?”

What Ed was doing only worked to make Alphonse more flustered than before. “W-What are you doing brother?!” He said, but he complied with what the former Alchemist had ordered, using what little strength he had to move to the side.

“I’m gonna sleep with you.” Ed plopped onto the bed, the realization that he had forgotten his pillow was overcome by his reluctance to move from the comfort of a bed. “We use to do this all the time when we couldn’t sleep, after all this owe you this much.”

Although this touched Al’s heart immensely, it was obvious his brother was moments away from falling asleep so all he did was utter a silent thank you before a soft snoring sound filled the thin blonde’s ears.

The warmth coming from his brother and comfortable closeness soon got to Alphonse as his mind began to slip into unconsciousness, it almost felt as if the younger was floating. _‘…It was stupid to think it, you don’t hate me brother, just like I didn’t hate you…’_ Al justified his feelings as he shifted to face the sleeping Elric, letting the feelings sink in as he finally let himself slip into his first dream in years.


	2. Fury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fury is what Al felt after a general visited him and his brother in the hospital.

It had been about a week since that night, Ed was now finally well enough to be escorted from the hospital, yes, escorted by none other than the General himself.

El pouted as he crossed his good arm over his chest, he didn’t want to be escorted out of the hospital and to his home, his brother was here and he couldn’t stand being around the bastard for more than a few minutes at a time.

Alphonse didn’t say anything, he knew his brother couldn’t stand being with Roy for too long, but the thought of them together, possibly alone, brought up something from the pit of the blonde boy’s stomach.

Not long after being told of this escort had the duo heard the door open and the curtain shift to reveal Roy Mustang and Riza Hawkeye, causing a sigh of relief to escape Al’s lips.

“Hello Fullmetal, Alphonse, it’s great to see you two after so long.” Riza told the two as she felt a small smile fall on her face.

Ed laid back in his chair with his arms behind his head. “Same here but sorry to tell ya that I’m no longer the Fullmetal Alchemist, so it’s just Ed now.” The way Edward said it shocked the others to the core, it was so nonchalant and, stranger still, only slightly irritated.

“What do you mean, Fullmeta- I mean Ed?” Roy asked, sounding awfully confused about the statement.

“I meant what I said, I’m not the Fullmetal Alchemist anymore, I lost my alchemy!” Ed was obvious in trying to avoid the true reasoning he would no longer be able to perform what he was so known for.

For a moment, maybe one that was too long, everyone was quiet. Then, came a disturbing sound to many, a chuckle that quickly turned into a laugh from General Roy Mustang drew everyone’s attention.

“What do you mean? You couldn’t have dropped it anywhere!” Roy joked, causing Edward to get extremely flustered.

_‘Quiet.’ His lips pursed into a frown._

“I’ll have you know that I lost it the way anyone would have lost it!” The shorter male’s shouts made even Hawkeye cover her ears.

_‘Quiet!’ He dug his nails into his skin as he clenched his fist._

“Look, the both of you stop it! Especially you Fullm-.“ The sniper was suddenly cut off by her superior.

“Quiet.” His voice falls on deaf ears.

“Did you drop it while looking up at everyone else?” The flame alchemist laughed once more. It took Ed all he had to not attack the general.

“Quiet!” This time the voice was followed by the sound of a bowl breaking as it failed to hit the general. For the past few minutes Alphonse had been ignored, and now he was going to make sure that the words he said would at the top of his lungs would be heard just as clearly.

“Al what’s wro-“ The elder brother made his way over to his sibling but almost flinched at the sound of another glass breaking, this time it was a small plate that at one point held food on it.

“Shut the **hell** up you shitty general!” Alphonse was screaming at this point, his voice filled with desperation and fury.

“Alphonse it was just-“ Roy attempted to defend  himself only for the tray the two previous things were carried on to be thrown at him.

“ **I** told **you** to fucking shut up!”

“A-Al don’t swear like that!”

Alphonse was putting all his effort into moving, something that was extremely difficult with his malnourished body. Although, it is best taken into account that if he could leave the bead, he would have needed to be separated from the flame alchemist.

The trio was ready to pull away, in fact, Riza and Roy had taken a step backwards, but when the former alchemist had attempted to do so he was immediately pulled back by his thinner brother.

“You’re making fun of my brother, you’re hurting him, after everything he’s done for this country?! After everything he’s done for me!”  

In the heat of the moment, everyone would remain frozen until the cry of pain coming from a nurse who had just walked in was heard. A cup that Alphonse had thrown at the general ended up hitting the poor woman on the head, maybe not enough to cause much harm but the woman was bleeding.

While Hawkeye accompanied the woman to go get her wound cleaned Roy took Edward to the hall to speak privately.

“Look Fullm- I mean Ed, I might tease you from time to time and I commend you for not hitting me,” Roy placed an almost parental hand over the younger male’s shoulder. “but the fact of the matter is that what Al did could lead to something worse in the future. Hawkeye and I wouldn’t have been hurt, it wasn’t the same for that nurse.”

“Look Mustang,” confusion, worry and a small drop of guilt were noticeable in the former alchemist’s voice. “I don’t know what possessed my brother to do something like that, but you gotta understand that he’s just got his body back, his emotions aren’t gonna be all that well.”

“I feared this might happen.” Roy closed his eyes before he began speaking again. “Have you ever thought of what would happen the moment your brother regained his body and he suddenly had every emotion he’s never felt hit him like a bus?”

Ed paused for a minute before saying anything.

“I had thought if it! I just didn’t think that it would be this bad!” Ed quickly hushed himself out of fear of Alphonse hearing. “Look, I know my brother didn’t mean to do it, he meant to hit something more deserving, but he just need some time to get use to this body again and I wanna help him with that.”

“That’s precisely what I was thinking.” Roy spoke, instead of his triumphant tone he was a bit more somber. “I want you to take some time off of work and stay with your brother.”

“What?” At first Edward was happy to hear the news, but as the seconds passed he realized what his superior had meant.

“I’m… I’m giving you some time off. It hadn’t been my initial plan but I believe it must be done.”

“Well… I almost wanna thank you for that general, but I want my job back the moment I’m well again, understood?” The blonde spoke just a little too loudly

_‘I’m sorry…’_

“Understood, just spend some time with your brother, he needs you more right now than we need you, so take this as a way of spending quality time with him.” Just as he was about to leave Roy pulled out a card with a Hotel, name and room on it. “You can stay there until your brother can go home with you, don’t worry, it’s on the state.” With that the general turned and left the building and Hawkeye followed soon after.

Edward stood in the hallway for a moment, not in shock but just to plan what he’s going to tell Alphonse once he goes back into the room.

The moment he steps in the room he puts on his best smile.

“I’m back Al! You don’t need to worry about the nurse, she’ll fine.” The former alchemist states as he walks over to his brother; However, before Ed could continue he was cut off

“I’m sorry…” Spoke the younger of the two. Al’s long blonde hair didn’t allow Ed to see his face, but he hated the thought of seeing his younger brother cry.

This completely stopped Ed in his tracks, a moment ago he was about to scold his younger brother, but seeing his brother shaking in front of him turned his blood to ice.

“No don’t cry Al! It’s alright!” The shorter male attempted to comfort his brother, even going as far as to put his arms around his brother.

“But the nurse is probably mad at you because-“ ‘ _Because of that General, my brother did nothing wrong,’_

“I-It’s nothing, I’ll have my job back in no time! You’re more important to me anyway!” Al’s grip around Ed tightened, this comforted both of the brothers.

_‘You don’t even like your job brother, you took it because of me. I’m sorry… but I don’t want you to go back.’_ Al continued to shake, what Ed didn’t know that this wasn’t out of sadness, it was out of fury.

“Now what do you say we go around the hospital for a bit? For a chance of scenery?” Ed offered.

A wide, happy smile appeared on Alphonse’s lips. His brother’s closeness was probably the only thing that could sooth Alphonse.

“Yeah, that would be nice, brother.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: Al felt jealousy when Winry hugged Edward just a little more tightly than she should have.


	3. Jealousy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jealousy is what Alphonse felt when Ed started hugging Winry a bit too tightly.

It had been a few months since the promise day and now all the duo wanted to do was return to Resembool and, more importantly for Edward, return to Winry.

 Al was also excited to return, he hadn’t made that list of foods he would eat once he got his body back for nothing.

However, the look on his brother’s face as the two walked up to what was basically their childhood home brought a strange feeling to the younger male. Although before he had any time to describe it he was pulled into a loving embrace by Winry, one that Ed returned just a little bit too tightly for Al’s liking. Alphonse was stopped by the blond woman as she quickly pulled the two of them inside, and just as quickly Al tried to set aside that feeling.  

“Hey Winry, can you please make pie? It’s been on the top of my list!” Al stated, giving the woman a wide smile, one she quickly returned with a proud one of her own.

“I’ll be right on it!” She stated, but instead of quickly running to the kitchen sparks began to fly from a piece of metal she was melting.

“Winry what the hell are you doing?” A tint of humor filled Ed’s voice as he got closer to the woman and peeking over her shoulder.

“I’m making the oven! Just wait a bit and I’ll be done!”  She shoved Ed away and continued with her craft.

Pinako trotted in and began chatting with the boys and commenting on how thin Ed’s right arm and Al’s body look.

“Y-Yeah, they haven’t spent the best time on the other side, have they?” _‘But it’s what brother gave me, so I love it.”_ Al hoped to get a response out of Ed who looked absolutely love struck, this earned a chuckle from the elderly woman but this also caused Al to frown.

“If you’re so madly in love with her then just talk to her Ed.” Pinako spoke before sucking on the pipe she had a little more. “You’d be surprised what actually talking about your feelings will get you.”

The elder Elric was obviously flustered by this comment and quickly began trying to defend himself before ultimately giving up and hanging his head. Al on the other hand was not amused, giving an almost calm face as he went to defend his brother.

“No he no-.” Ed cut in.

“I’m not that obvious, am I?” Ed asks, but before he could get a response Winry called Pinako to help her with the pie to which the elderly lady quickly left but not without giving a smirk to Ed. “She can make an oven all herself but needs help making a pie?”

 _‘This can’t be.’_ Al thought, clearly in denial about what couldn’t be more obvious to everyone they knew. _’It just can’t! I had him first! It has to be a joke.’_ Al was just about to ask the elder if this affection was true, but only saw his brother with the same star struck gaze he had moments ago.

Alphonse took this opportunity to scoot closer to his brother, who was still in his very enamored daze.  This made Al press their legs together, hoping that this way would get him a response.

It did get him a response, and one that Al liked too. As soon as Ed felt his brother against his leg he quickly turned, at first Ed was concerned but gave Al a charming smile.

“What’s wrong Al? I thought you’d be more enthusiastic about today, so why the sour face?” Ed asked, turning to his brother and only then realizing how close the two were sitting from one another, to the point where Ed couldn’t move his left arm without touching Al.

Ed was just about to pull away, only for Al to place his arm around his brother, this time to where he was almost on top of the elder.

“Al what are you doing?” Ed would have pushed his brother off on any normal day, but he remembered just how much weaker his brother was. Since Ed didn’t want to cause Al another trip to the hospital he decided to stay put.

“I’m following Granny Pinako’s advice.” Al stated warmly, giving a look that reassured Ed, but this calm completely broke with what his brother was about to say. ”I love you, brother.”

Suddenly Ed’s throat went dry, he opened his mouth to speak but words were unable to form, he swallowed hard but was silenced by his little brother pressing their lips together. This causes Edward to go into a state of shock, his heart beating faster and faster by the second.

The friction of this kiss was one of the most pleasurable things that Al had ever felt, and he was glad that he could experience this after so many years of being numb. His brother’s slightly chapped lips made Al’s stomach do flips as the kiss lingered on for a few seconds.

When Al finally pulled away the former alchemy user tried to crawl out from under the other male.

“Al don’t ever-“ Al had sealed their lips once more, this time a bit more forcibly as to not let his brother speak.

 _“If he can’t speak he can’t say anything about it.’_ Every time Edward would try to show disgust about what was happening Al was quick to stop him. _‘I’m sure he’ll warm up to it, eventually.”_

The sounds that Ed was making had begun to worry Winry and Pinako, the brothers seemed to be …fighting? Either way, it sounded normal enough for them, they were brothers after all, but something was off, especially with Ed’s yelling.

 “You two better calm down before we get there!” Winry yelled as she pulled the pie out of the oven with extreme care. From the other side of the kitchen door however, a loud thud could be heard as Ed fell to the ground and stumbled to get up and away from his brother.

“Al stop this! You’re my little brother!” Ed shouted, backing up into the table as his brother stood and made his way towards him with the help of his crutch. In any other situation, the blonde would have made his way to help his brother with his walking, but this wasn’t the right time to be brotherly.

“And?” Al asked almost defiantly. “You act as if we had never committed a taboo before, **brother. "**

In some sense, Ed hated that he had grown taller. No longer could he maneuver himself like he did when he was no taller than 4’8, and right now, he needed that ability to escape.

Al was now in front of the elder blond, Ed was now sitting on the table, he mentally prepared, to hit his brother if needed.

Al leaned in, this was enough to make Ed swing his weaker arm but it only grazed his brother’s cheek as he let his clutch fall to the ground and let himself collapse on the former alchemist.

Al’s only support was his brother as the two locked lips once more, and this time, the sound of a falling tray was heard before a scream from Winry pierced the surreal silence of the room as the two women witnessed what was happening.

“You two better have a very good explanation for this…”


	4. Curiosity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edward finds himself growing curious as to what Alphonse does whenever he's not home.

A loud groan escaped Edward’s lips as he slammed the phone in, a look of frustration painted the short male’s face as he turned to leave the small booth.

“Damn it! It’s been almost a month since they kicked us out and she’s still not picking up!”

A small side glance at the other was all Alphonse needed for guilt to fill his gut. They had been kicked out ever since Winry saw them kiss, Edward was hoping they would listen to the reason after she cooled down, but that didn’t seem to be happening any time soon.

“You can try calling her back! It’s not like we’ll run out of money.” He pushed into his pocket in search of some change before the soft hand of his elder brother pushed on Al’s to stop him.

“Nah, it’s enough for today, I already ask too much of you already.” Regret pained Ed’s voice, he wished things had gone differently but he couldn’t dwell in it right now. “It’s already too late anyways, I’ll try next week… ”

As the former alchemist began to walk away from the booth Al reached for his brother, a sad smile painted on his face. “Can I… Can I walk you to work today?”

The nod Edward gave was much less hesitant than it was the first time Alphonse had asked that question. It seemed that since what happened in Resembool Alphonse had… repented? Felt remorse of some sort? Either way, Alphonse wasn’t as active with his sexual advances, at least not anything his golden eyes could see, and this brought a great relief to Edward.

The two made their way towards the library where, ever since they came back to central, Ed had been conducting research on Alkahestry with books that had been imported from Xing. _‘I might have to thank Him tomorrow for making this deal, I don’t want my brother in Xing, much less without me there.’_

A small wave and a smile is what the brothers each other on, what one left with just a small feeling of joy, the other left with a feeling of satisfaction.

It had gotten to about midday when Edward abruptly awoke from his slumber, as he quickly glanced at the clock the golden eyed researcher had failed to see any other person in the library, in fact, now that he was thinking about it, he had to use his key to get inside. This lead Edward start his search for the calendar, something that laid nearly inside his co-worker’s desk. The sight however made him regret ever coming here.

_‘HOWCOME NO ONE EVER TOLD ME TODAY WAS A-‘_ The images of every time he had been told that this day was coming flooded his mind, yet what was strange and what probably caused this confusion is that Al was absent from that sea of reminders. In fact, although the younger was had seemed to calm down he had also become more secretive.

Usually Ed wouldn’t poke around in this but seeing as he had some time to kill and his brother would be out on a mission in the town of some sort he thought it would be fun to stick his nose where he hadn’t before.

As Ed locked up the building his mind began to wander, only coming back to reality to change direction as he made his way to their apartment. The fact that he had almost dozed off on this small walk alone brought up a problem in himself that Ed didn’t want to think of.

_‘I really should visit Gracia, it’s been too long since I’ve seen her and maybe she can help me with what happened between us and Win-“The_ blonde couldn’t finish his thought, he was absently standing in front of the empty complex, an unknown fear filling his body as he opened the door and stepped inside.

The house had a hollow yet ominous feeling to it, the place was just as clean as how they left it but something in the air told Edward that there was more to look for.

First he checked the kitchen, everything seemed fine. Than the living room, with the study following soon after. Not a book out of place. Then he got to his brother’s room, nothing other than the bed, the drawer, a full-length mirror and a neatly placed camera.

However, it was in the golden blonde’s own room, the place he found himself rarely sleeping in, where he saw that something was off.

A small box under the underused bed, it wasn’t locked, it wasn’t even very well hidden, but something screamed out for Ed to turn away and forget about this and yet this only tempted the researcher more.

Once he had thought it over, Ed delicately pulled open the box and let out a sigh of relief. It was a box of pictures Alphonse had taken, a lot of them seemed to be of cats and cute animals, some of families.

_‘I’ll have to ask Al about this when he gets home, maybe he’s doing this as a side job or something.’_

-

Alphonse had to swallow back his displeasure. It was seven in the afternoon and Al had finished his work, even making time to talk to some of the people there, but what brought down his chipper mood was that Edward was nowhere to be seen.

The bronze alchemist hoped with all his heart that Edward wasn’t home because he knew that if the smaller male was there, it wouldn’t be because he was getting a nap in the afternoon.

After a few minutes of searching the places Ed most frequented the younger brother now stood face to face with their current home. With a small sigh, he opened the door and found what he had worried about, but he was comforted by the look on the elder’s face.

“Hey Al! You could have told me that you were taking pictures like this, when do you have time to take these?” Edward called for Al from the table they had in the kitchen, a good lot of the pictures spread across the wooden surface.

“Oh I take them when I go home early or if I skip lunch.” Alphonse goes to the stove and puts water and tea on the stove. “Where did you leave the box?”

“I have it right here,” Ed lifted he box up and a small envelope fell to the ground, causing Al to straighten out. However, before Ed opened the brown envelope he was distracted by the smell of Chamomile. “also don’t make any for me, I’m not really in the mood.”

“I already made enough for the both of us.” He spoke, pouring the liquid for the two of them but reached into the back of the cabinets for a small pair of pills he crushed with a spoon then poured inside his brother’s cup.

Edward set his cup to the side and was about to open the small packet until he saw the look on his younger brother’s face.

Alphonse was mustering up his best puppy dog face, hoping he wouldn’t have to take the envelope by force. “Drink it, please?”

The heart of the former Fullmetal softened at the sight of those big pleading eyes and nodded. ”Fine, but only cause I need to relax a bit.” Taking the cup and placing it on his lips. One last glance at Al was what caused him to take a long gulp of the drink.

The sudden relaxation of Edward’s muscles was almost startling to the duo. Edward believed that this came from the tea while Alphonse knew better, even going so far as to mask his guilt with a sip of his own tea.

The curious male enjoyed this relaxation but continued with that he was going along with earlier, and Alphonse couldn’t make a move to stop it. The envelope was harder to open than expected, seeing as it was sealed in the same way that Ed had sealed his watch when he was younger, but paper was only paper. With enough force, the golden male ripped open the envelope, causing the pictures to scatter on the ground.

“Damn it! Sorry Al I’ll pick them up right now.” Ed got to his knees and grabbed one of the pictures of him and his brother, only to be pushed aside by the other so he could pick up the photographs instead.

“Don’t touch them!” Al was quick to snatch the few that Ed had gotten and most of the others. Hopefully without being noticed, Ed stuffed one of the pictures into his shirt and struggled to stand up, Alphonse offering a hand to the drowsy elder for support. “I’m sorry brother, for bursting out like that…”

Edward yawned loudly before he could speak, causing Al to leave the room as quickly as he could. This caught Edward off guard but it was probably for the best to just leave it now. Taking one last gulp of his own tea and placing both cups in the sink caused the smaller alchemist to feel even more sleep deprived than he truly was.

Crawling into his bed in the nearby room was work enough, now all that was left was to throw his clothes to the side. With a soft thud, a ball of discarded clothes landed a few feet from the bed and Ed had finally fallen into a deep sleep, not even noticing as his brother stepped into the room and searched the discarded heap, eventually finding what he was looking for.

Amongst the darling family photos and the adorable kittens was a couple of images Alphonse would never share with his brother. A special one in particular was the one he was holding right now.

The picture had stains on it and consisted of Edward sleeping as he was right now, but his body seemed to be just so… **inviting**.

In fact, lately all of Ed had been very inviting, very **accepting** , almost as if he was a **tamed** animal. The way the elder blonde would stick to Alphonse’s side, accept anything given to him by the younger almost entirely without question. Al was sure this was a leftover feeling of trust from when he would take care of Edward when he was in his armor and it was a feeling Alphonse never wanted to betray. That is what lead him to take these kinds of pictures of his brother, for Alphonse found it better to not lay a hand on his brother, even if he was asleep.

_‘It’ll feel better when he wants it, when he begs for it, but for now, I guess I’ll have to stick to staining the pictures.’_


	5. Confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edward just didn't know what to do anymore, with his brother's advances becoming as strong as his grasp, Ed finds himself running to Xing in an effort to find himself and his brother.

For the first time since he could remember Edward found himself staring at an empty seat in front of him, before the young blonde would have seen a body of tin followed by the kind voice that echoed inside. Now there was nothing but a memory of the helpful voice and the image of a darker blonde waving a defeated expression as his elder left for Xing,

_‘This just feels wrong to leave him like this, no matter what he’s still my little brother…’_

Edward turned to the scenery outside the window, the vast lands of desert he was spared from crossing holding his attention and dragging him out of the world around him only for the sand to later bury him in his thoughts. _‘I just wish he’d tell me why he told Mustang to keep me away from Xing.’_

Ever since he heard about Alkahestry from Long while in Rush Valley, Edward had been meaning to pay the foreign country a visit. However, he was met with resistance--or rather, reluctance--from his former superiors. Initially he thought nothing of it. Yes, Edward couldn't stand this, so he sought out another person to fulfill his wish, someone just as eager about the art as he was: Olivier Mira Armstrong.

It didn’t take long for her to get everything needed for Edward’s leave, in fact, the former alchemist would say he was almost thankful had the general not threatened him with death if he didn’t return with enough knowledge to arm all of Briggs  

After being dropped off in the train station by the younger Armstrong and Alphonse he waved before getting on the train, only to look back and find something that haunted him for the entire train ride. A look of pure and utter disapproval on the face of his younger brother, one so strong that, had this not been for the wellbeing of the both of them, Edward would have preferred to face Olivier for not having gone to Xing,

-

 Alphonse climbed up the stairs of an all to nostalgic complex, clinging to his briefcase just as if it were his life vest and he were lost at sea where he would swim towards one of the few people that could bring him salvation.

After finding the door he was looking for, the bronze haired boy tapped lightly on it, completely unaware of the known stranger on the other side.  

“Come in!” Called a womanly voice, what should have been a wave of comfort as he entered quickly froze the moment he was faced with the one who he had believed would never return to their lives.

“Hey Al…”

The alchemist was in an utter state of shock at who was before him and it took all of the willpower he had in his body to not reach out and touch the fragile image of his former friend, he was too scared that she would break or fade the moment they came into contact.

“Hello… Winry.” The tension in the room was thick enough to keep Alphonse quiet and strong enough to bind him to where he stood. It was the same case for the mechanic, she wasn’t even able to muster up a witty remark to hide behind, not after she had said too much.

Finally, one of the two had to begin, and if someone needed to say something it was Winry. “Where’s Ed? I want talk to him…” The restraint grew stronger the more they thought about the object of their affection, thankfully this was cut short by the sight of Gracia’s warm smile as she brought a cup of coffee for each of them to the table.

With a loud huff of his breath the former suit of armor wished he could build up the nerve to lie, to say that his brother was on his way over or even that he was in the hospital, just with him being here. However, that was not the reality, and something the Elrics always tried to do was face their own reality.

“Brother left for Xing a day ago, he was planning on researching alkahestry.”

_‘Speaking as properly as ever.’_ An unknown expression masked Winry’s face, one that was an unwanted mystery at a short glance but the longer it stayed the more the other two could identify with it. The feeling was an unreachable love, Gracia felt it ever since Maes had died, Alphonse ever since he had developed the feelings he had for his brother in spite of knowing how wrong it was, and Winry felt it the moment Alphonse kissed Ed.

“Y’know, Edward came around the other day, he said he was trying to call you. He even tried a few times from my line.” Gracia stated as she pointed to her phone, hoping that what she was about to say would be worth telling them. “He told me to give you a message if you ever came by.”

“Well what did he want to say?!”

Alphonse closed himself in his walls of insecurity, hoping that the thick walls would protect him from the expected harsh words from the object of his affection. _‘I love you Winry, please save me from my brother Winry. Al’s what’s holding me back.’_

“He wanted to say that he was sorry.” Both Alphonse and Winry paused almost automatically as Gracia continued. “He said he wanted to keep the friendship he’s had with you, but that he’s very confused about a lot of things.”

The young man now had to force his ears open, hope had taken a hammer to the walls protecting his heart, and now that he was hearing, he knew he couldn’t stop.

_\--_

_“I see, so that’s why you’re leaving for Xing?” Gracia asked, she was extremely thankful that Elicia had gone on a play date with one of her friends that day, she wasn’t entirely sure how her daughter would handle what Edward was telling her if she just so happened to overhear._

_“Not entirely, I’m not mad at Al for kissing me...” The golden blonde shifted as a clear sign of discomfort. “ I’m just so confused as to why he would do something like this… maybe me leaving will help him clear his mind. ‘I’m also confused as to my own feelings about this.’_

_“Are you going to tell him any of this? Wouldn’t it worry him that you were gone from one day to the next?”_

_“It would, that’s why I told him that I’m going to learn more of the alchemy they use there.”_

_It was obvious that Edward didn’t want to leave Al like this, things had just gotten back to normal, well as normal as they could get with the younger brother being in love with his elder. What only added to his worry was the lack of response Ed had gotten from Winry, this would have led to Edward to give up had he not been as stubborn as he was._

_“But there’s one thing I wanna ask of you before I leave.” Edward huffed out, afraid of seeing the look on Winry’s face when she hears this. “I want you to tell Winry something if she happens to pass by. Tell her that-.”_

_\--_

 “I’m too confused right now, but there’s one thing I do know, I don’t feel like I could be any more than a brother to you Winry.”

The silence sank into the room, no one was fully able to process what the golden former alchemist had said to the three of them, not even Gracia who had been told of these feelings in their full and harsh beauty.

_\--_

_“I feel terrible, even if she’d accept that as an excuse... She saw me kiss my brother and then she told us to leave. “The spite in Edward’s voice served to clench his fist in helpless anger. “What only makes it worse is that after all this time, I don’t think it would be right to tell her that it was a complete accident, hell, I don’t even know what I would say to her if she actually picked up.”_

_Before Gracia could utter a single response Edward’s fist met the table, the main in his hand couldn’t match the anguish in his heart. “Damn it! Why did this have to happen to me! And yet here I am, running away instead of trying to fix it!”_

_\--_

The three were left to wallow in their own feelings, one trapped in a cage of sorrow, another unsure of how to handle this and finally, one reaching out for a small string of hope that came from his brother’s words

-

The road to Xing had been shorter than it was a few years ago, ever since the promise day Xing and Amestris began to trade with each other and thus it was no longer needed for people to cross the desert like before.

As he stretched out his arms and legs Edward made his way out of the cart and sure enough a familiar face was there to greet him.

“Mei Chan! How’s it been?” Ed waved in an almost sluggish manor, to which Mei responded with one of her own, yet much more enthusiastically.

“Mr. Edward!” She ran up to Ed and gave him a loving embrace, something Ed welcomed but not enough to let it push him over. This caused the black-haired girl to give a puzzled look to the Amestrian.

“Is something wrong Edward? You look like you haven’t slept in days!”

“Were you always this loud? Anyway, it’s nothing, how have you been? Where’s that Prince?” Ed looked around the station before Mei stepped in.

“He’s become emperor! He can’t be seen out here, it’s too dangerous!” She flailed her arms around, the two were almost about to start fighting until the yell of a man could be heard in the distance, causing the duo to run towards it.

“I can stand a little fighting, but trying to rob this poor old man of everything he’s got on his back? That’s just twisted.” The voice of Ed echoed throughout the ally and before anyone could register what was happening Mei jumped and kicked one of the thieves square in the face.

This was followed by Ed clapping his hands and placing one on his right arm, when he got no reaction he ran to one of the others and began fighting as well.

Through the array of fists and hits the two continued to fight, quickly gaining the upper hand in this.

Yet this wouldn’t last for long as the more he fought the more Edward’s movements became slower. One of the masked men noticed this and took his chance in grabbing the shorter male in headlock, pinning him to the ground just long enough for Ed to retaliate with a move of his own, slipping from the other male’s arms and kneeing him in the face.

After that Mei and Ed had managed to force the group into the center, both of them attempted alkahestry and alchemy. However, it was only Mei’s kunai that got a reaction, causing a cage to appear around the thieves.

_‘Something’s wrong with Mr. Edward, he should have used his abilities by now…’_ But before Mei could ask any questions she remembered that she had to return the elderly man’s belongings, who started to thank them, even going so far as to get down on his hands and knees.

“No need to thank us like that! We’re just your friendly neighborhood alchemists!” Edward boasted before helping up the man up to his feet and taking another moment to catch his breath.

_‘Yes, something is definitely wrong…’_


End file.
